me: *eats cookie dough*
some weak ass person: “you’ll get salmonella poisoning!!!”
when you’re taking a shit at your spanish friend’s 3rd birthday party and you have to check your email
"white people can’t danc-"
"white people can’t twer-"
i don’t even understand how boy bands from the late 90’s dance so well
yeah they’re always so nsync
YOU FUCKING DIDNT
Alright, calm down, if you’re going to fight, take it to the back street, boys.
im in a mentally abusive relationship with myself
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